I don’t think about this much anymore, but I remember the day that I called my friend. It was probably 12 or 13 years ago at this point. And I remember telling her that I felt like I was existing and not really living. This began the conclusion of almost a decade of me living my life for myself, and a part from Christ.
This began the conclusion of a decade of seeking love in all the wrong places, instead of running into the arms of a loving Savior who was always calling me home. Going after the approval of man, instead of the heart of God. Trying to find healing in anything but “His stripes”. And going after the ways of the world, instead of the path He had before me.
Yes, I was existing but not truly living. And I was probably like the dry bones that are described in Ezekiel 37.
“The hand of the Lord was on me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the Lord and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”
I said, “Sovereign Lord, you alone know.”
Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”
The Truth Is…
I was reflecting on what dry bones meant. And when your bones are dry there is no blood running through them. There is life in the blood (Leviticus 17:11), and where there is no blood, there is no life.
And maybe you feel like you are existing and not really living. Like there is no life running through you, and like you are in the grave.
The truth is there is hope. There is hope even when things feel hopeless. There is a love that is greater than all sin, and there is One who can bring beauty from the ashes.
There is One man who calls the dead out of their grave, bring what is dead into life eternal. His name is Jesus.
As I said above, I don’t think much about the time in my life where I felt like I existed and wasn’treally living. But I should, because I should always remember how far His grace has carried me. I should always remember the life that was redeemed, and that it came at a high cost. His death on a cross.
The answer is…
I can’t say that Jesus “called” my name per se. But He was quietly leading me back to Him. It came in the desire to live again, and there was only one place I knew to go. Back to the church. I can’t say, I exactly knew what I was looking for, I just knew where to find it.
I didn’t know I would find a love deeper than all of my sin, even though that is a truth that was always there. I didn’t truly know the price He paid on the cross, just to tear the veil that kept us apart, but that didn’t change that it was true. And I didn’t know that the love I was looking for was a love that would sacrifice His life, for my salvation.
The Same Is True For You…
The truth is that we are all sinners in need of grace.
And, Jesus is the answer you are looking for. The One who was rejected, is the One who brings you eternal life. There is no other authority by which we can be saved. Our deepest desires can never be met by another name. Only Jesus. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He is never changing, yet changes us, for His glory.
He is the One who tells us to Just believe… to Come to Him all who are weak and weary… and to Follow Him.
He still uses the sinner saved by grace to do what is good, honorable, and true. He still calls the dead out of the grave, by name. He still leads those to go where they will find what they don’t know they are looking for.
My grave can look different now a days. My grave can be paralyzing fear and anxiety. Disbelief. Insecurity. Yet, He is still doing what He did 12-13 years ago. Still calling me to Come. Still there waiting for me to call on His name… and still waiting for you to do the same today.
All you must do is call on His name. He has already called yours.